Professional Mover

So I picked up my van in October and decided not to leave for my road trip until April so now I have this horribly impractical vehicle for the entire winter. I decided to put my muscles and my van up on Craigslist to see if anyone would hire me to help them move.

Sure enough people emailed me and I actually made $2000 in December. Actually, I made $2000 and acquired one memorable story in December. Here’s the story.

Helped this man move from Newton to Watertown. Loaded all his shit into my van and unloaded it for him at his new place. Worked hard for him for 2 hours and he gave me 150 bucks. Well actually, he gave me a check for $150. As soon as he took out his check book, I told him sorry man I don’t take checks, only cash. He came back saying my ad doesn’t say cash only, to which I conceded and took the check. After all, he gave me a $50 tip! Or did he?


I cashed that sucker and forgot about everything until I came back from a movie at 10:40pm a few weeks later and opened a letter from Bank of America saying that my $150 check bounced and here’s a $12 fee for ya too. My heart dropped not because I was out $162, but I dunno, my feelings were hurt. That fucker got me to sweat for him and won’t even pay me with real money.

I googled him and found this:

“Beryl Porter, 59, of Waltham, was arraigned today on charges of securities fraud, money laundering, larceny over $250 from a person over the age of 60, larceny over $250 dollars (6 counts), uttering forged checks (4 counts) failing to appear in court (2 counts), and being a common and notorious thief, according to Middlesex District Attorney Marian Ryan.”

Well that makes sense.

I check my watch and it’s 11pm. I call him anyway, no answer. I text him telling him I’m coming over tomorrow to get my money in cash! No reply.

I sit on my bed and decide I was going to make a bad decision and go to his house right now. One reason was yes I was angry, but there was more calculation than you might think. At 11pm, I would have more of an element of surprise, not to mention he would have a higher chance of even being there.

Anyways, I grab my keys and text a buddy telling him where I’m going and to call the cops if I don’t reply by midnight.

I get to his place in Watertown and turn off my headlights before I pull into his driveway, as you do. Anyways, the rest of the story I’ll have to tell you in person since some stuff might not have been legal but the end of the story is that he gave me my money in cash and that was that.



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